We all make choices based on imperfect information. Rarely do the consequences of these choices turn out exactly as predicted. When the consequences are unfavorable for us, our friends hindsight and regret come into play. "I am unhappy now as a result of choice A. If I had chosen choice B, I would be ____ (1000x happier, healthier, whatever... insert various nice things here). Why didn't I choose B? I am so stupid / horrible etc etc etc"
Stop right there. Because isn't regret itself based on highly imperfect information? How do you know how the world would have turned out had you gone down the path of B? There is so much uncertainty in this re-envisioning of life that it merits its own verb tense -- the conditional.
Instead of focusing the "coulds" and "woulds" that B offer (which is tempting), it is better to come to terms with the fact that we chose A and to deal with the resulting (negative) feelings from that initial choice. Better to deal with the fallout of the present and look towards the future than to wallow in the past.
Easier said than done, of course. Most of the time I wish I were in a different time and world. I wish I were younger, or brighter, or prettier. More outgoing, more optimistic, more excited and passionate, less envious ... But now I am venturing into another dangerous verb tense -- the subjunctive.
Why can't I just stay in the indicative and know what the hell I am actually doing???
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